A New you

Well here we are again - another year over - a new one just begun.
The excitement (or stress) of the festive season, well and truly a distant memory, as we settle back to the reality of everyday living once again. For many people this will mean a return to the pressures of trying to balance a hectic lifestyle between work and family commitments. For others, it may simply be the continuation of boredom or lack of direction in their life. While for many others, it will bring loneliness and sorrow.

But the New Year also provides an opportunity for reflection on the past year - what we've achieved, our relationships and the kind of person we've become, and on aspects of our life that we would want to change or improve. For some, this may be a painful process about loss of loved ones,loss of job or status or loss of one's health. Many will resolve to make changes that they believe will make the forthcoming year a better time for them. The New year heralds a magical time of optimism, when a fresh start can be made - a new job, diet, exercise routine, new habits, new relationships- OUT WITH THE OLD, IN WITH THE NEW!!

And indeed, if successful, these changes may lead to a healthier, happier and more fulfilling life. However, New Year resolutions can be notoriously tricky to stick to but, we stand a better chance of success if we focus on identifying changes (goals) that are achievable, specific and realistic for us. Writing them down and talking about them with family and friends can be helpful. We need to work in small steps towards our goal, congratulate ourselves for completing each step and never beat ourselves up when we have a setback.

But, despite good intentions, it can still be very difficult to change a lifetime of habits and it's often all too easy for people to get caught up in over optimistic enthusiasm at the start of the year, only to end up feeling a hopeless sense of failure as February sees the demise of their life changing aspirations.

The best changes occur when we start to understand that there are always reasons for the things we do - often unconsciously linked to anxiety, stress, depression, low self esteem. And this is why it's so hard to make lasting changes.

Counselling can help us identify underlying reasons to our behaviour and help us manage the emotions linked to them. It can help to restore our sense of well being and self confidence so that we can then make more positive decisions about ourselves and the kind of life we want to live.